Beloved Son
by ShinimegamisScythe
Summary: Shiori reflects on Shuuichi'sKurama's secret I know I know, I suck at descriptions...


Beloved son

silvery shadows, green and gold  
that's what I see in your eyes  
when you smile at me without seeing me  
wisdom, far beyond your age  
longing and loneliness  
Even when you are with your family

My son, what kind of power is it,  
That lies within your gentleness?  
How do you manage to smile at someone softly  
While at the same time you put mockery and contemt into your gaze?

Because that's what I see in your eyes  
Each time your fanclub lies at your feet  
Oh, those poor girls  
They melt away, when they bask in your smile  
Without paying attention to the hardness in your eyes

There it is again, this golden light in your eyes  
When you think you're alone in the greenhouse  
A golden brightness surrounds your form  
Like sunshine - but outside it's raining cats and dogs

The plants feel comfortable in your presence  
I see your roses, so unnaturally beautiful  
red, yellow, even black, blue and violet ones  
They bask in your presence

I remember, last week  
When some children were playing on the street  
Their ball flew into our front garden  
Into the pansys*  
Little Shuuichi gave to me  
You know how much I love these flowers

After you threw the ball to the children,   
they disappear - it's dinner time  
You are sure nobody sees you, don't notice  
that I'm watching you from the window

Golden light surrounds you  
as you lay your hands between the crushed flowers  
and I see - see how they recover  
You talk to them, tell them how much you love them  
for making me happy with their sight

I know you're not like other children  
Or should I say teenagers, young adults?  
then, when I carried you under my heart  
the doctor told me you would die  
Your heart was too weak, he said

but just when I began to accept your approaching death  
I felt you kicking with renewed strength  
a miracle, the doctor said  
I would really love to know, who or what you are  
I had felt it within my heart  
When the flame of my unborn child died

You are so gentle and friendly  
The perfect son  
Are you an angel, that took the shape of my child?  
Or a spirit of nature?  
Will you reveal your secret to me,  
When you think the time has come?  
Or will I never know?

You look at me, and I see your confusion  
Do you suspect, that i can feel it?  
Absorbed in thought, you play with a lock of your hair  
It is of silver  
You seem to have made up your mind  
I can tell from the expression on your face

It is saturday  
But when I wake up, I hear you rummaging in the kitchen  
Usually you like to sleep in  
Whenever the occasion arises  
My husband and his son are gone for the weekend,  
for fishing - so we've got the day for ourselves

Time for a confession? It almost seems so  
You open my bedroom door  
A rich breakfast on the tray in your hands  
prepared with love - but only for one person  
Two roses you brought along  
One red and one white, but both are still in buds

you look at me, hesitating  
We need to talk, you say  
You don't seem to feel very well  
In your eyes I see love, but naked fear as well  
Fear of rejection?

I smile at you  
I know, I say, are you going to reveal your secret to me,  
That you've been carrying for so long?  
you look at me in astonishment  
You seem to be relieved,  
That I offered a fitting prelude to your confession  
You take one deep breath and start your tale  
Your almost talk the whole day

It is late in the afternoon, when you stop speaking  
You gaze into my eyes - searching  
Your fear makes my heart contract painfully  
I put all my love into my smile  
And feel happy, when you slowly relax  
Reveal your true form, i ask you, and you breathe in audibly  
Am I sure about this?  
I nod

This golden light again  
Your frame begins to blur  
You become taller, more muscular  
And you are beautiful 

A soft summer's breeze enters through the open window  
And plays in your silvery mane  
The big triangular ears twitch slightly  
as you listen to the song of the birds  
Your Foxtail - I'd like to pull it  
Like a little child...  
How would you react to this, creature of the wilderness?

You may claim to be a demon  
For me you will always stay my beloved son  
A son, the gods equipped with a special gift  
Because they love you just as much as i do

And the two buds begin to bloom

~owari~

(c)00/08/31  
ShinimegamisScythe

one final thought: This was originally written in german, so in this translantion   
the meaning of the flowers got lost. The german word for pansy is Stiefmütterchen,   
which is an endearment for Stiefmutter (=stepmother). And, as you know, Shiori is the   
stepmother of little Shuuichi 


End file.
